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|  ABSTRUSE4.17.2016, Sunday, April 17, 2016 ♥
Hujan lebat membasahi bumi sebaik sahaja Nain keluar dari pintu kereta 'Gajah' tu. Lower my mirror "Jangan TAWAR HATI dulu" "Give me one months to mend myself" :) I pledged to him right infront of his house.Okay here I am sitting on my bed while updating this blog for my future planner! I hope some day I'll looked back to this posts and feeling proud of myself on how far have I became ! Beyond expectation! Oh yeah, guys guys guys . Today it's dawned on me regarding "HIDDEN RELATIONSHIP" "PRIVATE LIFE" or something something like that. But I didn't say private life is way more decent than public life. Okay I talk about abstruse matter. And I've done the things that I'm scared Nain should do but its me the one who be doing those stupidity!That was a little shameless of me , eh no! I mean HUGE SHAMELESS! My blind eyes has finaly widened open of the benefits in silent relationship. Since Nain saying.......
Bingggg! That is it! The last one menunjukkan bahawa Allah itu Maha AdiL. Furthermore, his way of thinking is amazing following with his action. Eventho I've hurt Nain by my stupidity, but still he shooo those negtivity away and loves me unconditionally. Ahhhh, his kindness makes me fall for him all over and over again! i can't ! and I think he's at different tier than me. It's like I'm just an ugly duck that merely fortunate as becoming his female partner hahahahahahahahahhahhahahaah. wht!? That's how I understand of how important to love ourselves, sebenarnya menjaga diri sendiri bukan untuk diri sndiri tpi kebaikan for the one we love jugak . Sesiapa yang berkaitan dengan kita pasti akan kena tempiasnya jugak dengan apa kebodohan kita tu. So, aku dah faham macam mana nak sayangi diri sendiri. I love myself for Allah's sake , for my agama , family and my love :)
Wow, I have so much respect of him now and have been aspired to be like him . he gives me the push i need to move forward
________________________________________________________________ nain "apa you rasa klau i yg buat you mcm tu?" me : "sakit hati lah hmm" nain "yeahh, sbb tu lah. i pun sakit gk tpi i orgnya cool, dlm 3 4 hari sembuh lah tu" me : *DANG! HAMMER, about to cry -in my heart- I know you're getting bored of hearing this , tapi I want to say I'm really sorry Nain..... I've been searching all the words to apologize but my head stucks like a broken computer. Lagi pun, 3 jam sebelum jumpa dengan Nain , Han mmg dah banyak research tentang cara2 nak minx maaf, apa nak buat untuk tenangkan hati and I do create my own definiton! And the only person I told about my definition is Ally (Allisya Balqis) *Semasa di traffic light depan rumah* "You know Ally, there's something I got from this misconception situation. I came to realize that I've been selfish all this time to God." Dengan muka terkejut "Wait, I can't fathom what are you trying to say?" Me breathe in breathe out, sambil tengok next traffic. Oh still merah "Yeah, remember my latest Ex boyfriend? Ally "Efie you mean? okayyy" Me " Okay I guess that's unnecessary to mention. Okay, long ago , I couldn't accept the fact about our broken relationship kan ? That's bcause I refused to return Efie to God. Padahal, Efie tu Tuhan punya, bukan aku. Dah lah aku pinjam ciptaan dia, lepastu dengan tak malu nak salahkan Tuhan sebab ambil Efie balik, rasanya aku macam perampas yang dah rosakkan ciptaan dia. Same goes to Zul , I think I have to learn about tawakal in this matter. After putting all efforts in mending this misconception, and I'll mke sure the last thing I've to do everytime I'd done with worldly tasks, then ........... *tukar gear D untuk gerak kedepan sebab traffic hijau My acah-acah genius speech makes Ally eyes popped out of her head (AMAZED) -still listening tho. Me : *setengah jalan* then it's my battle in Solat, to pray harder, khusyuk more, and buat syaitan menangis. Kalau aku tak buat last benda ni, maknanya I don't love Zul kerana Allah, but kerana nafsu cinta.After all making du'a for someone is really important.You held somebody in your du'a. As a prove you love them enough to put them in Allah care. Otherwise, you can define me as stupidest girl in entire world for making same mistakes twice after Efie. I'll make sure,this time I'll take this matter seriously. Sebab Zul punya life, ada kena mengena dengan my bright future. Don't you think? Ally : Aku tak pernah terfikir mcm tu dohh. But what do you mean I think? Me : Easy, he's my life now :) Ally : Wait, i couldn't tell which drama channel you bring this time haahhahahaahahahahahahhahahaah. However, I may be able to clear up the misunderstanding, but I still dunno how I could possibly heal his wounded heart. I am at faults of his broken and a contrite heart
AND OUR MISUNDERSTANDING END AMICABLY
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